A few years ago, I was introduced
to the concept of choosing one single word to help guide my
actions through the coming year. That one single word becomes
the cornerstone of what's important to me without actually being a goal.
When I set goals, I seem to have an innate ability to undermine
them. It's almost as if I become determined to sabotage my own
efforts, as if a goal is simply setting myself up for failure; simply too much
pressure. One single word has no such power.
Instead, it allows me to move at my own pace, while I ever-so-slowly build
awareness of the little things that ultimately impact the big things in my
life. One single word is all about being rather
than doing; it encompasses every aspect of my life, rather
than a single component of it.
Choosing one single word to live by for an entire year takes
time, self examination, and reflection. For
me, it starts by focusing on a few personal traits that could use a bit of
tweaking. My word for 2017 was CHALLENGE. I was transitioning into
retirement and felt I needed to find new outlets not only for my mental well-being
but also physically. I started a bucket list and on that list
was starting a Joy Jar so that I remembered to celebrate the little joys along
with the big joys. Through the year, I ticked off a number of items, including
that Joy Jar. Many items remain a work
in progress. Of course, I am also adding new items and removing those that no
longer feel relevant. In other words, my
bucket list is very fluid, just like life!
CHALLENGE can be a very big topic, or at least, that's what I thought. .
. until I chose my word for 2018: BE. While I have managed to go a
little more with the flow over the past year, I still have a lot of work to do toward
living in the moment without trying to control every aspect of it.
I just read the blog, 34 Life Lessons I Learned in 2018; No.
4, 'Planning is Escapism' nailed me! Did I happen to mention that my entire
30-year career has been focused on planning?
It’s not only what I do, it’s who I am!
I don't know that I fully agree with the philosophy that making a plan
is simply another technique in the procrastination arsenal, but it sure is food
for thought. It's also a good reminder that it's okay not to have a plan for
everything. If I thought CHALLENGE was, well, challenging, landing on BE has
even been moreso! Baby steps!
Did I mention that my partner and I both have very strong personalities?
We have both worked very hard to build professional reputations for knowing our
business and being very good at what we do. We have both become very accustomed
to running our own show with little to no interference. This has resulted
in more than a few hiccups while learning to embrace our retirement. Dare I use
the word conflict? If the shoe fits. . . Letting go of
pride, being open to compromise and bringing harmony into our
relationship can only be beneficial. Long ago, we accepted that we do not
have to be on the same page, we do not have to agree on every subject, to live
in harmony with each other. We have often joked that in
our 40+ year relationship, we have successfully cancelled out each other’s vote
in every single election at all three levels of government! My word, harmony, can be the
touchstone I need to remind me that it’s not about control; it’s about embracing
the very differences that likely attracted us to each other in the first place!
So, there you have it. my word for 2019. Harmony. I must say, I'm already loving it!
Harmony [hahr-muh-nee] noun, plural har·mo·nies
1.
agreement; accord; harmonious relations.
2.
a consistent, orderly, or pleasing arrangement of parts; congruity.
Resources:
https://www.dictionary.com/browse/harmony
https://medium.com/the-post-grad-survival-guide/39-life-lessons-i-learned-in-2018-6e832834cc7e?fbclid=IwAR21dyQPMTroD1TLyp4qi9y3Qfd-1Rpy7aZQ2odQcPGuVDcYEjlnNiZEQOY
https://www.wikihow.com/Live-in-Harmony-with-Others
